There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
