i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Your penis caused this!
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