Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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