so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize