We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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