Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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