Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
