White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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