K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
