he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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