you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
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