I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
