OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
