Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
