found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
