Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
