U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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