The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
