Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
