I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
