So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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