Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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