Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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