Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
