I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
lol hangovers are for mortals.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
