I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
So many bounce houses so little time
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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