how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
