If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize
