she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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