They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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