More tranny stories later!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
i can't believe i had my finger in that
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
