So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
