i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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