only you would photoshop your dick
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
