Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
