Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
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