is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
