I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
