Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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