Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
