Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
