hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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