So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Shitshow foam night was such a success
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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