...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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