We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
