Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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