Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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