so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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