I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
