The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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