I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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