fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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