Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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