You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I could make wine with my vomit
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
